1
00:00:34,167 --> 00:00:37,368
AH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!

2
00:00:39,473 --> 00:00:42,574
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
        AND NICKELODEON

3
00:00:42,643 --> 00:00:44,776
CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL
        CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
        --www.ncicap.org--

4
00:01:00,161 --> 00:01:01,760
[HORSE NEIGHS]

5
00:01:01,829 --> 00:01:05,330
I HAVE SHOWN YOU
THE HORRORS OF WAR!

6
00:01:07,501 --> 00:01:10,502
THE DEVASTATION
OF FAMINE.

7
00:01:13,140 --> 00:01:14,773
PICTURES OF MY BIRTH.

8
00:01:14,842 --> 00:01:16,775
BUT I DON'T THINK
YOU COMPREHEND

9
00:01:16,843 --> 00:01:19,277
WHAT AWAITS YOU
IN ADULT LIFE.

10
00:01:19,346 --> 00:01:20,945
TO BETTER PREPARE YOU

11
00:01:21,014 --> 00:01:23,482
FOR THE INEVITABLE
CHARACTER-BUILDING HORRORS

12
00:01:23,550 --> 00:01:26,051
WE WILL NOW PLAY
    BLUDGEON BALL!

13
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:27,152
IT'S FUN!

14
00:01:35,662 --> 00:01:38,130
SO, IT'S HUMAN
        AGAINST ALIEN.

15
00:01:38,198 --> 00:01:40,132
IRONIC I SHOULD
        FACE MY ENEMY

16
00:01:40,201 --> 00:01:42,167
IN THIS STUPID,
        BARBARIC GAME.

17
00:01:42,236 --> 00:01:44,936
LET THIS BE
        OUR BATTLEFIELD.

18
00:01:45,005 --> 00:01:48,107
IT'S THE SIZE OF
    A HIPPO, THAT HEAD.

19
00:01:48,175 --> 00:01:49,374
[TWEET!]

20
00:01:53,247 --> 00:01:54,846
All: WHOA!

21
00:01:54,915 --> 00:01:56,414
HEE-HEE-HEE-HEE!

22
00:02:18,405 --> 00:02:20,072
HMM.

23
00:02:26,346 --> 00:02:28,781
EEE! AHH! OOH! AH!

24
00:02:28,849 --> 00:02:29,881
AH-AH-AH-AH!

25
00:02:34,522 --> 00:02:37,456
NO-O-O-O-O-O-O!

26
00:02:37,524 --> 00:02:40,292
OOH! AH! EEE! OOH!

27
00:02:44,298 --> 00:02:47,265
WHOA! LOOK AT HIS EYEBALL!

28
00:02:48,802 --> 00:02:51,069
THE EYEBALL OF
            AN ALIEN INVADER!

29
00:02:51,138 --> 00:02:52,838
LIES! LIES!

30
00:02:52,906 --> 00:02:55,874
HAVE YOU NEVER
HEARD OF...PINK EYE?!

31
00:02:55,942 --> 00:02:57,542
IT IS A NORMAL
HUMAN ILLNESS.

32
00:02:57,611 --> 00:03:00,912
YEAH. PINKY HAS IT
PRETTY BAD RIGHT NOW.

33
00:03:02,916 --> 00:03:05,116
[GROANING]

34
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:08,586
YEAH. ZIM'S JUST
SICK AND UGLY.

35
00:03:11,492 --> 00:03:14,960
NO PINK EYE. GREEN SKIN.
        RED THINGS. OH!

36
00:03:18,932 --> 00:03:21,033
OW! OOH! AH! EEE!
            OW! OOH! AH! EEE!

37
00:03:21,101 --> 00:03:23,802
[LAUGHING]

38
00:03:23,871 --> 00:03:26,138
YOUR SCREAMING WAS
    AMUSING FOR AWHILE, DIB,

39
00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:29,240
BUT NOW YOU'RE JUST SCARY.

40
00:03:29,309 --> 00:03:30,809
GO TO THE COUNSELOR'S OFFICE.

41
00:03:34,414 --> 00:03:36,848
YES, I AM NORMAL.

42
00:03:36,917 --> 00:03:39,751
SO NORMAL AND UGLY AM I!

43
00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:47,892
HI, I'M MR. DWICKY,
            THE NEW COUNSELOR.

44
00:03:47,961 --> 00:03:49,428
WHAT HAPPENED TO
THE OLD COUNSELOR?

45
00:03:49,496 --> 00:03:51,630
SOMETHING...HORRIBLE.

46
00:03:53,300 --> 00:03:55,700
HELP ME!

47
00:03:55,769 --> 00:03:58,137
SO, YOU WANNA TELL
ME WHAT'S WRONG?

48
00:03:58,205 --> 00:03:59,972
NOTHING.

49
00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:02,207
THIS FILE SUGGESTS
            OTHERWISE.

50
00:04:02,276 --> 00:04:04,442
DOESN'T MATTER.
NOBODY BELIEVES ME.

51
00:04:04,511 --> 00:04:07,179
THE EARTH'S BEEN
        INVADED BY AN ALIEN.
        HE GOES TO THIS SCHOOL.

52
00:04:07,248 --> 00:04:09,515
MY OWN PEOPLE HELP HIM
        BY BEING SO IGNORANT.

53
00:04:09,583 --> 00:04:12,050
YOU CAN LAUGH NOW.
    I'M CRAZY AND FULL OF LIES.

54
00:04:12,119 --> 00:04:14,052
ACTUALLY, I ALWAYS
            BELIEVED IN ALIENS,

55
00:04:14,121 --> 00:04:16,388
BUT I NEVER FOUND
            ANY PROOF, SO I DID
            THE NEXT BEST THING.

56
00:04:16,457 --> 00:04:17,889
I WORK WITH PUBLIC
SCHOOL CHILDREN.

57
00:04:17,958 --> 00:04:20,025
AND THEY'RE SCARY, TOO.

58
00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:23,228
I'VE GOT PROOF.
THIS IS AN ALIEN
SPACESHIP I CAPTURED.

59
00:04:23,297 --> 00:04:25,797
AND HERE'S ZIM'S ROBOT DOG
TAKING OUT THE GARBAGE.

60
00:04:25,866 --> 00:04:27,933
I TRY TO GO THROUGH
    ZIM'S TRASH ONCE A WEEK.

61
00:04:28,002 --> 00:04:30,568
MOSTLY, I JUST FIND BURNT
    GERBILS AND WORN DOWN
    RUBBER PIGGIES, BUT--

62
00:04:30,637 --> 00:04:32,904
SO THE DOG BRINGS
OUT THE TRASH?

63
00:04:32,973 --> 00:04:34,773
HOW CAN IT EVEN HOLD THINGS
WITH THOSE NUBBY ARMS?

64
00:04:34,841 --> 00:04:37,442
I KNOW! AND NO ONE
        ELSE THINKS IT'S WEIRD.

65
00:04:37,511 --> 00:04:39,444
OR LIKE HOW ZIM
        DOESN'T HAVE EARS,

66
00:04:39,512 --> 00:04:41,213
OR HOW HE DOESN'T
    THINK PONIES KNOW
    WHAT WE'RE THINKING.

67
00:04:41,282 --> 00:04:43,615
WHOA! CALM DOWN.
            I BELIEVE YOU, DIB.

68
00:04:43,684 --> 00:04:45,884
Y-Y-YOU BELIEVE ME?

69
00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:48,053
WAIT A MINUTE. YOU ESCAPED
FROM SOME EXPERIMENT

70
00:04:48,122 --> 00:04:50,655
WHERE THEY HIT YOU IN THE HEAD
WITH CAR DOORS, RIGHT?

71
00:04:50,724 --> 00:04:52,891
HA HA. ALMOST.
                BUT NO.

72
00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:54,259
I REALLY DO
                BELIEVE YOU.

73
00:04:54,328 --> 00:04:55,928
I EVEN WANT
                TO HELP OUT.

74
00:04:55,996 --> 00:05:00,431
A TEAM? REALLY?
TWO BELIEVERS
AGAINST THE WORLD?

75
00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:01,900
AND ZIM?

76
00:05:04,939 --> 00:05:06,838
IF YOU'RE SERIOUS,
MEET ME AFTER SCHOOL'S OUT.

77
00:05:06,907 --> 00:05:08,306
YOU GOT IT, PARTNER!

78
00:05:08,375 --> 00:05:09,774
PARTNER!

79
00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:14,413
DWICKY! YOU REALLY
            BELIEVE IN ALIENS?

80
00:05:14,482 --> 00:05:17,348
NOT ANYMORE. ALL THE
CHILDLIKE WONDER WAS
RIPPED FROM MY HEART

81
00:05:17,417 --> 00:05:19,851
THE DAY MY FOOT GOT
STUCK IN AN ESCALATOR

82
00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:21,586
AND ALIENS DIDN'T
COME RESCUE ME.

83
00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:25,624
NO. I'LL JUST HUMOR DIB
TILL HE TELLS ME WHAT
THE REAL PROBLEM IS.

84
00:05:25,693 --> 00:05:30,963
AH! THAT'S PSYCHO-
            TECHNICAL TALK!

85
00:05:31,031 --> 00:05:32,197
IT IS.

86
00:05:37,737 --> 00:05:39,871
WE TEAMED UP JUST IN TIME
FOR YOU TO HELP OUT WITH MY PLAN

87
00:05:39,940 --> 00:05:41,873
TO GET ZIM TO CONFESS HIS
ALIEN SELF TO THE WORLD.

88
00:05:41,942 --> 00:05:44,142
HEY, THAT SOUNDS
FUN! WHAT'S THAT?

89
00:05:44,211 --> 00:05:46,578
A SCHEMATIC FOR AN ALIEN
IDENTIFICATION TRANSMITTER.

90
00:05:46,646 --> 00:05:49,314
I YANKED IT FROM ZIM'S COMPUTER.
YOU CAN SEND MESSAGES

91
00:05:49,383 --> 00:05:51,216
WITH ENCODED SIGNATURES
FROM ALIEN RACES.

92
00:05:51,285 --> 00:05:54,319
YOU KNOW, IF IT WORKS,
    WE CAN PRETEND WE'RE ALIENS

93
00:05:54,388 --> 00:05:57,022
AND SEND ZIM A TRANSMISSION,
    SETTING HIM UP FOR A TRAP.

94
00:05:57,091 --> 00:06:00,425
RIGHT! WE CAN CATCH HIM ON
VIDEO WITHOUT HIS DISGUISE.

95
00:06:00,494 --> 00:06:02,561
I WAS GOING TO USE IT TO CALL
HIM NAMES IN ALIEN LANGUAGES,

96
00:06:02,630 --> 00:06:04,062
BUT YOUR PLAN'S
COOL, TOO.

97
00:06:19,146 --> 00:06:21,079
NOW DO YOU UNDERSTAND
        MY LATEST

98
00:06:21,148 --> 00:06:25,284
AND MOST BRILLIANT PLAN
        FOR EARTH CONQUEST, GIR?

99
00:06:25,352 --> 00:06:27,418
I GONNA EAT THAT FISH.

100
00:06:27,487 --> 00:06:30,589
NO, GIR. THE FISH
            IS PART OF THE PLAN.

101
00:06:30,657 --> 00:06:31,756
[RINGING]

102
00:06:31,825 --> 00:06:33,525
IS IT YOU, IRKEN ZIM?

103
00:06:33,593 --> 00:06:36,995
YES, I AM ZIM!
WHO ARE YOU?

104
00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:40,332
WE ARE DIGZUM AND COMMODORE
SLOAT OF THE PLANET PLOOKISIA.

105
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:43,134
WE HAVE CRASH LANDED ON
        THIS HORRIFIC PLANET

106
00:06:43,203 --> 00:06:45,771
AND YOU HAVE SOME
        MATERIALS WE COULD USE
        FOR REPAIRS, YOU KNOW?

107
00:06:45,839 --> 00:06:48,206
GIVE ME ONE REASON
WHY I SHOULD HELP YOU.

108
00:06:48,275 --> 00:06:51,843
A TRADE. IN RETURN FOR
        YOUR HELP WE WILL GIVE
YOU SOME SUPER WEAPONS.

109
00:06:51,911 --> 00:06:54,145
WE WOULD BE MOST
        GRATEFUL...YOU JERK.

110
00:06:54,214 --> 00:06:57,482
HEH, I COULD ALWAYS
USE MORE SUPERWEAPONS.

111
00:06:57,550 --> 00:06:59,217
YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW THIS,
BUT I'M, UH,

112
00:06:59,285 --> 00:07:01,352
SORTA GONNA WIPE OUT ALL
THE LIFE OF THIS PLANET.

113
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:03,822
GREAT! WE'LL MEET YOU
    IN THE WOODS IN ONE HOUR.

114
00:07:03,891 --> 00:07:05,156
AND DON'T WEAR
                A DISGUISE.

115
00:07:05,225 --> 00:07:06,958
JUST SO WE KNOW
            YOU'RE NOT A HUMAN.

116
00:07:07,027 --> 00:07:08,526
THE WOODS, HUH?

117
00:07:08,595 --> 00:07:10,061
VAGUE, BUT OK.

118
00:07:10,129 --> 00:07:12,430
BUT THOSE WEAPONS
BETTER BE SUPER.

119
00:07:12,499 --> 00:07:15,367
OH, THEY'LL BE SUPER.
        THEY'LL BE SO SUPER

120
00:07:15,436 --> 00:07:18,002
YOU'LL RUE THE DAY
            YOU EVER MESSED
            WITH PLANET EARTH.

121
00:07:18,071 --> 00:07:21,372
[MANIACAL LAUGHTER]

122
00:07:26,079 --> 00:07:28,213
HE SEEMED LIKE
            A HAPPY GUY.

123
00:07:33,387 --> 00:07:35,286
THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT!

124
00:07:35,355 --> 00:07:39,124
TODAY WE EXPOSE ZIM FOR
    THE EVIL BEAST THAT HE IS!

125
00:07:49,903 --> 00:07:52,704
OK, I DON'T THINK
        ZIM'S SHOWING UP, DIB.

126
00:07:52,773 --> 00:07:54,772
MAYBE IT'S TIME YOU
            TWO STOPPED PLAYING

127
00:07:54,841 --> 00:07:56,908
AND TOLD ME THE REAL
            REASON YOU'RE
            SO FRUSTRATED.

128
00:07:56,976 --> 00:08:00,411
PLAYING? THIS ISN'T
PLAYING, THIS IS--

129
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:01,979
YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME!

130
00:08:02,048 --> 00:08:03,014
YOU...

131
00:08:03,083 --> 00:08:04,950
I THOUGHT YOU WERE DIFFERENT!

132
00:08:05,018 --> 00:08:08,486
LOOK, I KNOW YOU THINK
        I LIED, AND I-I DID,

133
00:08:08,555 --> 00:08:10,021
BUT I WAS ONLY
            TRYING TO HELP--

134
00:08:10,090 --> 00:08:12,824
ISN'T THIS JUST GREAT!
WHILE YOU WASTE MY TIME,

135
00:08:12,893 --> 00:08:15,192
EARTH GETS ONE STEP
CLOSER TO BEING TAKEN OVER!

136
00:08:15,261 --> 00:08:16,728
THAT'S MY PROBLEM
RIGHT THERE.

137
00:08:16,797 --> 00:08:20,198
MY PROBLEM IS THAT
THE HUMAN RACE SEEMS
TO WANT TO BE DESTROYED--

138
00:08:20,267 --> 00:08:24,403
SAY, WHY DON'T WE TALK
        ABOUT THIS AT SCHOOL--

139
00:08:38,118 --> 00:08:39,250
HE'S HERE!

140
00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:41,786
WHO...WHAT....AN ALIEN?

141
00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:43,021
A REAL...

142
00:08:43,090 --> 00:08:44,589
A REAL ALIEN. YES.

143
00:08:44,658 --> 00:08:46,724
GLAD TO SEE YOU'VE
COME AROUND, MR. DWICKY!

144
00:08:46,793 --> 00:08:48,193
HERE. RECORD.

145
00:08:50,364 --> 00:08:53,098
ZIM! WE MEET AT LAST!

146
00:08:53,166 --> 00:08:55,500
I JUST SAW YOU
THREE HOURS AGO...

147
00:08:55,569 --> 00:08:57,402
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
HERE, STINK-MEAT?

148
00:08:57,471 --> 00:08:59,204
YOU FELL FOR
                OUR TRICK, ZIM.

149
00:08:59,273 --> 00:09:01,707
THERE ARE NO
            PLOOKISIANS COMING
            TO GIVE YOU WEAPONS!

150
00:09:01,775 --> 00:09:03,108
ISN'T THAT RIGHT,
            MR. DWICKY?

151
00:09:03,177 --> 00:09:04,509
DWICKY, HUH?

152
00:09:04,578 --> 00:09:06,978
TWO AGAINST THE ARMADA.
I'M NOT WORRIED.

153
00:09:07,046 --> 00:09:08,580
HI! LOOKA THIS!

154
00:09:08,649 --> 00:09:10,115
DOODEEDOOO!

155
00:09:10,183 --> 00:09:13,017
[SQUEAKING NOISES]

156
00:09:15,922 --> 00:09:17,823
GIR! ENOUGH!

157
00:09:17,891 --> 00:09:21,159
TWO WILL BECOME
        MILLIONS ONCE THE WORLD
SEES THIS TAPE, ZIM.

158
00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:22,594
WE'LL SWAT--HUH?

159
00:09:42,449 --> 00:09:44,348
I DON'T SEE ANY OTHER
PLOOKISIANS HERE.

160
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:45,850
BUT I COULDA SWORN...

161
00:09:50,290 --> 00:09:51,256
[SQUEAKING]

162
00:09:54,327 --> 00:09:55,927
HEY, WHO ARE YOU?

163
00:09:55,996 --> 00:09:57,895
OH, HEY, HOWSIT GOIN'?

164
00:09:57,964 --> 00:10:00,332
I'M MOOSHY AND
THIS IS SPOOPTY.

165
00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:01,766
WE'RE PLOOKISIANS.

166
00:10:01,835 --> 00:10:04,436
WE HEARD A PLOOKISIAN
SIGNAL AND WE CAME
BACK TO CHECK IT OUT,

167
00:10:04,504 --> 00:10:06,304
YOU KNOW, 'CAUSE
THAT'S WHAT WE DO.

168
00:10:06,373 --> 00:10:08,673
YEAH, BUT IT MUSTA
        BEEN A MIX-UP. SORRY
        FOR THE INTERRUPTION.

169
00:10:08,741 --> 00:10:10,374
WAIT, I SENT THE SIGNAL!

170
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:12,911
I WAS USING IT
TO LURE THIS ALIEN.

171
00:10:12,979 --> 00:10:14,445
HEY, NONE OF OUR BUSINESS.

172
00:10:14,514 --> 00:10:17,081
YOU'RE REALLY ALL ALIENS!?

173
00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:20,218
HUH...AHHH...
                OF COURSE NOT.

174
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:21,586
GIMME THAT CAMERA.

175
00:10:21,654 --> 00:10:24,589
WELL, TO US
            YOU'RE THE ALIENS.

176
00:10:26,593 --> 00:10:30,328
[BOTH LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY]

177
00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:34,499
THAT IS NEVER NOT FUNNY!

178
00:10:34,568 --> 00:10:35,901
I KNOW! I KNOW!

179
00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:37,969
SPOOPTY, YOU CRAZEH!

180
00:10:38,038 --> 00:10:40,071
ENOUGH! WHERE
        ARE MY WEAPONS?!

181
00:10:40,140 --> 00:10:41,372
WHAT WEAPONS?

182
00:10:41,441 --> 00:10:43,608
THE SUPER WEAPONS
        YOU PROMISED ME!

183
00:10:43,677 --> 00:10:45,410
GEEZ, ZIM,
            DON'T YOU GET IT?

184
00:10:45,479 --> 00:10:47,678
THEY NEVER
            TALKED TO YOU. IT
            WAS ALL A TRICK.

185
00:10:47,747 --> 00:10:48,746
WHERE ARE THEY?

186
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:50,749
I DUNNO WHAT
YOU'RE TALKIN' ABOUT,

187
00:10:50,817 --> 00:10:52,417
BUT IF IT'LL MAKE YOU HAPPY,

188
00:10:52,486 --> 00:10:54,586
WE HAVE SOME SUPER WEAPONS
LYING AROUND IF YOU WANT 'EM.

189
00:10:54,655 --> 00:10:56,688
SPOOPTY, GET THE GUY
THE SUPER WEAPONS.

190
00:10:56,756 --> 00:10:58,590
YOU SURE ARE NICE, BOSS.

191
00:10:58,659 --> 00:11:00,559
WELL, I DO WHAT I CAN.

192
00:11:02,929 --> 00:11:05,831
A REAL SPACE SHIP!

193
00:11:05,899 --> 00:11:07,165
SPACESHIP!

194
00:11:07,234 --> 00:11:10,835
AND YOU FLY THROUGH
            THE STARS SEEING ALL
            THE UNIVERSE?

195
00:11:10,904 --> 00:11:12,837
YEAH, WELL FLYING
THROUGH THE STARS

196
00:11:12,906 --> 00:11:15,740
WOULD BE PRETTY STUPID, MAN.

197
00:11:15,809 --> 00:11:17,642
BUT, YEAH, WE FLY AROUND.

198
00:11:17,710 --> 00:11:19,110
YOU WANNA COME ALONG?

199
00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:20,879
WOW, DO I?

200
00:11:20,948 --> 00:11:24,649
YAH!

201
00:11:27,587 --> 00:11:30,154
HEY, THANK YOU!

202
00:11:30,223 --> 00:11:31,322
DWICKY!

203
00:11:31,391 --> 00:11:32,990
WHAT ABOUT OUR TEAM?

204
00:11:34,127 --> 00:11:35,260
OOH.

205
00:11:43,670 --> 00:11:45,003
SAD, LITTLE DIB.

206
00:11:45,072 --> 00:11:47,538
NO MORE ALLY AND
NO MORE PROOF!

207
00:11:47,607 --> 00:11:48,939
HOW DID YOU KNOW
TO COME HERE ANYWAY?

208
00:11:49,008 --> 00:11:51,075
ZIM, YOU MORON!

209
00:11:51,144 --> 00:11:53,611
I TOLD YOU I ARRANGED
        THIS MEETING!

210
00:11:53,680 --> 00:11:57,315
UH-HUH. WELL, SEE YOU.

211
00:11:57,384 --> 00:11:58,916
COME ON, GIR!

212
00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:09,627
[GROANING]